It’s always amazing how the mind works.
In my situation, I was incredibly unhappy in my job for more reasons than I can share here because some of those issues should be addressed but, unfortunately, it’s impossible for me to be the one to address them with the right people.
So I finally managed to step away but have found I’m still not happy… as I shared in my last post. But I’m the type of person who always needs to identify the answer to the question “why?” because I feel it’s important. Most people who start a new job should be ecstatic and when you tell people it’s a job they tend to want to know why! So little things slowly come to light when I least expect them too. Up to now it had to do with tearing the office apart and putting it back together again and doing it again and that the rules are constantly changing.
Today, just now, I also realized the one email that had gone around saying that even on our days off we should be checking our email! I don’t know why that didn’t strike a chord sooner but it certainly did in these moments! I’m having an issue focusing on anything to do with writing because I’m so overwhelmed and I realized that I was online at my old job and was able to take 30 seconds to peruse an email pertaining to writing to see if it was worth following up on later. I was always connected and in sync. Now I don’t have that but what has replaced that as well is that email thing… when I was off on Wednesdays, I never gave much thought to work. Unless someone texted me from the office to ask a question I was able to do whatever I wanted. I never had to get onto the system to check anything.
So yet another point against!
So I guess that’s why my agitation levels are rising. I am feeling very overwhelmed by everything and everyone. I guess that’s also why Christmas movies are a constant on my TV right now too… the entire season, the message that Christmas sends are soothing.
I actually started to write a short story the other day… I’m just not feeling into finishing it…
And so it goes!